"Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I'll meet you there." ----- Jalal ad-Din Muhammad Balkhi-Rumi, 13th century Sufi poet.

"Have faith that people do their best. I don't know anyone who would eat with pigs out of a trough in a muddy barnyard if he knew that a well-prepared meal was on the table in a clean house - do you?" Greg Baer

"The Secret in healing Narcissism is not to heal it at all, but to listen to it. Narcissism is a signal that the soul is not being loved sufficiently. The greater the Narcissism, the less love being given." ~ Thomas Moore, 'Care of the Soul'.

Q. Is it really possible to heal NPD?

A. Anything is possible. You do not have to be a negative statistic on a probablity curve of people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Heal NPD :: Open Topic :: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing
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TcBrown
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 16:04:54 SunNov 9 2003 )

Winter tends to depress me as I'm a heat worshiping soul trapped in a cold climate. Often I sulk all winter and my sulking started early as winter came knocking sooner than expected. However, this morning I felt energized and went out for a brisk early morning walk. It was not as cold as it has been the past week and it felt cold to reconnect with the cool morning air.



---
You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial in a life is the relationship to the self . .. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime , you are the only one you will never lose.

~ Jo Courdt

 
 
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free_of_fem
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 17:19:19 SunNov 9 2003 )

My spouse and I went on a 3-day busines s trip this week and managed to stay focused on the task at hand. There was some tension, but we shared a few lighter moments as well. We proved once again we can work well together on those rare occassions when the stars are seemingly in line. :biggrin:

  
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weissfamily
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 18:16:09 SunNov 9 2003 )

I not only survived yesterday's cooking lesson but I now know how to prepare a homemade lasanga. Not bad considering my teacher is in the 6th grade. I feel like a proud papa :ego:. Its good to know how to fix meals so that people actually eat them rather than burry them in the backyard. Sadly this has happened to me but that's a very long story. :ohwell:

  
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melaniemac
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 19:10:03 SunNov 9 2003 )

My hubby just called and I was able to let him know that I knew he broke our custody and access agreement without making a big deal out of it, or accusing him, or blaming him.

If feels good to get something off my chest without causing an argument!

Mel

  
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hestia
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 21:07:58 SunNov 9 2003 )

Hey all. It's been my first weekend without my son (he's at dad's) and it's been a rollercoaster emotionally. I miss him. But the positives-- I put in some classical music to listen to and cleaned out my closet. I did some work today and made $90! (I'm a stay at home mom right now, so getting a check every once in awhile reminds me of how nice it is!) I washed all the laundry. Now I'm going to goof off by staying up late and watching TV. Little guy comes home tomorrow!!!!!!

  
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Balbrenny
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 22:48:13 SunNov 9 2003 )

My 15 year old son asked if he could go to a party. - that 's the first positive - he asked rather than just taking off.

I put him through the 3rd Degree - Whose party? Where? Are you invited? (We have a HUGE problem here with gate-crashers) Will her parents be there? etc., etc.

He was a bit touchy about the questions - "Just let me live my own life". I told him that as his mother I was concerned for him, etc.

As he was opening the door to leave I said "Have a good time - I love you, mate"

He turned around and looked at me and said, "I love you, Mum" :claphands:

  
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TcBrown
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 01:34:50 MonNov 10 2003 )

Balbrenny, I wish I could have said I love you when I was 15. That's truly something to treasure.

Hestia- its never easy to go through all the firsts after a divorce. It will eventually become easier.

My Mom and I have been working on a project for two months which I think will be done tomorrow. All I can say is it feels good to be this close. I was beginning to wonder. :jump:



---
You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial in a life is the relationship to the self . .. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime , you are the only one you will never lose.

~ Jo Courdt

 
 
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RiChEsToRaGs
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 04:59:34 MonNov 10 2003 )

I made it through all of last week without an encounter of any kind with my ex-girflriend. I feel more relaxed and have more energy than I've had in a long, long time.

  
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jimmie
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 11:17:25 MonNov 10 2003 )

My Dad and I had a good conversation yesterday and it looks as though we might be close to reaching an understanding that will allow our family to be together for the holidays. As I've mentioned elsewhere my parents did not want to talk about old family issues with my son because they were afraid of being blamed. It is largely a result of this community that I've been able to reach a place of helping them see beyond blame and how open discussion can lead to healing. This has not been an easy process but right now I'm feeling good about where I'm at.

  
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Balbrenny
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 13:39:32 MonNov 10 2003 )

Congratulations, Jimmie. It sounds like you have worked through a big issue with your parents.

I continue to see many improvements with my 15 year old son. We have had a number of issues over the friends that he has to visit - damage to the house, money stolen (not just from me but also from a friend who was visiting) and finding out that somebody has lifted the spare key from the key rack and has been entering the house and using the phone to make overseas calls and calls to mobiles.

I had previously discussed with my son the sorts of friends he was choosing (as non-judgementally as possible) but after the above incidents over the last six weeks, enough was enough. I ended up banning them from the house last Friday - there are 5 or 6 friends that he can have over but no others. This was hard for me to do as I like the boys and girls concerned - I know their history and understand their problems but I have to be able to feel safe in my own house.

The positives - that my son himself is choosing not to associate with the others. Although it has been a financially expensive lesson, he has seen for himself that they were not true friends to him. He has learned that it's better to have a few friends who will help and support you rather than a large group who don't really care about you.


  
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