"Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I'll meet you there." ----- Jalal ad-Din Muhammad Balkhi-Rumi, 13th century Sufi poet.

"Have faith that people do their best. I don't know anyone who would eat with pigs out of a trough in a muddy barnyard if he knew that a well-prepared meal was on the table in a clean house - do you?" Greg Baer

"The Secret in healing Narcissism is not to heal it at all, but to listen to it. Narcissism is a signal that the soul is not being loved sufficiently. The greater the Narcissism, the less love being given." ~ Thomas Moore, 'Care of the Soul'.

Q. Is it really possible to heal NPD?

A. Anything is possible. You do not have to be a negative statistic on a probablity curve of people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Heal NPD :: Open Topic :: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing
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melaniemac
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 03:35:49 WedJan 21 2004 )

I am soooo proud of my little boys I am positiviely gushing.

They spent the evening with their daddy. As we were getting on jammies, the talk turned to the evenings events (I am much better about grillng my children about every minute of their time spent with daddy. It usually all comes out anyway!). They hung out at the bowling alley and then went to daddy's. They watched a movie. "Not James Bond mommy, Willy the Sparrow". Then my oldest couldn't take it anymore. He had to tell me the truth that they had watched James Bond and daddy told them to tell me they watched Willy the Sparrow.

They both apoligized. I reinforced how important it was to always tell the truth and how proud I was of them for telling me the truth.

Makes me so proud of them I could cry!

Mel

  
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zachery
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 05:11:03 WedJan 21 2004 )

Guess who? I missed everyone so much I had to stop in and say hi even though it still hurts like hell to sit on my rear for very long. I go back to work full time tomorrow which should be interesting because there is a lot of sitting around. Who thought I'd ever complain about not enjoying being parked on my ass.

My positive for the last several days is I ignored an effort from my ex-girlfriend to drag me into a fight she's having with the poor sap who she's currently latched onto. I don't know exactly what she thinks I could do to help her but she tried to get me to intervene. I said no and got out as fast as possilbe. I'm learning. The scary thing is I see others who are relationships like mine. Man there are some frightening people in this world. I'll go look around and see what's been happening. I'll be around more as soon as my tailbone lets me.

  
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Balbrenny
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 13:13:10 WedJan 21 2004 )

I've just spent 3 days training to start work with my new company - exhausting but plenty to think about. Really looking forward to it as they are a wonderfully supportive bunch of people. But 3 days of free lunches (and morning tea, afternoon tea, chocolate sultanas and mints on the table ALL the time) just after Christmas - I may need to join Weight Watchers tomorrow!!

  
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hestia
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 14:28:32 WedJan 21 2004 )

Zachary, good to hear from you, and glad you've kept your sense of humor. Mel, that's so cool! I confess, I used to grill my son too, until I learned that he tells me everything anyway. Oh yeah, and I stopped too because it was judgemental and critical, and I'm growing spiritually, yeah that's the ticket! :smile: Linda, hope you make lots of friends at your new job.

My positive is that I found a babysitter for Saturday. My husband shrank a lot of my clothes in the dryer and gave me money to replace them (may have mentioned that earlier). It was all summer stuff so I was able to replace everything at the 70% off sale at the outlet mall in Florida. Sooo.... I decided to spend the rest on a day of pampering at the spa. My friend is going with me. I know it's only Wednesday, but trust me, I've never done this before in my life, so I think it should count as a positive for at least four days! Even my therapist was proud of me for taking care of myself. Getting better at this taking care of my own business stuff....

  
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jimmie
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 22:21:55 WedJan 21 2004 )

Its great that you are taking care of yourself Hes. I'd like to
come along the next time you do this. :dowloadingevil::dowloadingevil:

Last night my wife and I attened an Al-a-Non session. After
listening to some of the stories from other parents and children
we decided things could be much worse with our son. We are
somewhat untraditional in the Al-A-Non tradition but people
have been very warm and recepitive. I'll count both of these
as positives.

  
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taransmith
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 17:59:00 ThuJan 22 2004 )

Don't know if anyone remembers or not but a while back
I told you I was in a major brouhaha with my parents. They
wanted me to take a work opportunity that would make me leave
this area for several months. I didn't want to because I'm happy
here, I like working with my therapist and I don't want to quit.
They see it as a chance for serious money, and their right. My Dad
only sees dollar signs, same with my Mom. I'm not that driven.

Yesterday I finally got the courage and told them I'm not going to do this
now or anytime in the near future. We talked for a long while. They weren't
thrilled, but I think they accepted my reasons.

Its feels good to stand up and say how I really feel. Not sure
if I've ever done this before.

  
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CoolBlonde
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 18:06:11 ThuJan 22 2004 )

I feel like I got some self esteem last week because it suddenly dawned on me that it would be ok for me to replace my embarrassing, old, beat-up, mismatched collection of used bedroom furniture with an actual bedroom set like real grownups have. This would be my first actual SET of furniture that actually matches. Of course, I was worried about spending the money and wondered if I was being irresponsible, but something told me it would be ok. So I went online and found a decent set that was on clearance for around $1000, and I drove out to the furniture store on Monday night and bought it. Then today I opened my email and my boss sent me a note saying that I will be getting a 4th quarter bonus of $1,100 in my paycheck next week. :claphands: This will pay for the whole bedroom set including delivery. Little miracles like this make me feel like at least there is someone up there who is looking out for me.




---
CoolBlonde
 
 
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TcBrown
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 21:35:04 ThuJan 22 2004 )

Congratualations on the bedroom set, CoolBlonde :cookiemonster: I've not reached the place where I'm ready to grow up and think about things like sets, so I tend to be easy to please when shopping.

I was getting very tired of getting kicked offline and decided to try upgrading my browser rather than just sitting here bitching. So far it seems to be working perfectly. It pays to look for the obvious rather than bitch that the world is unfair. :bricks:



---
You do not need to be loved, not at the cost of yourself. The single relationship that is truly central and crucial in a life is the relationship to the self . .. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime , you are the only one you will never lose.

~ Jo Courdt

 
 
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RiChEsToRaGs
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 12:29:56 FriJan 23 2004 )

It seems that lately I've been thinking stuff through and looking at consequences rather than just acting out. Some might say well duh, but this is a big milestone for me. I don't know about the rest of you but I've gotten into a lot of trouble for acting without thinking.

  
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hestia
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Re: 1,000 positive stepping stones on the path to healing ( 14:23:49 FriJan 23 2004 )

Taran, glad to hear you resolved this issue with your parents and that it went reasonably well. I think sharing your feeling to them was a big step in your healing! Coolblonde, your story is really, well, cool!

As for big steps that might seem like small steps to others, well, I guess those are a pretty important part of healing too, and I've got my own to share. My son woke up early which didn't leave enough time to both write and work out. Usually I would just get frustrated and do neither without even realizing I was giving up. Instead, I was able to do what I used to do in the work world, and think, ok, what is the priority. If I want to be a writer, then the priority is my work, so I wrote. And maybe that success will motivate me to work out this afternoon, since I have it free. I feel like I'm ever soooo slowly taking myself seriously enough to get my life back.

  
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