"Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I'll meet you there." ----- Jalal ad-Din Muhammad Balkhi-Rumi, 13th century Sufi poet.

"Have faith that people do their best. I don't know anyone who would eat with pigs out of a trough in a muddy barnyard if he knew that a well-prepared meal was on the table in a clean house - do you?" Greg Baer

"The Secret in healing Narcissism is not to heal it at all, but to listen to it. Narcissism is a signal that the soul is not being loved sufficiently. The greater the Narcissism, the less love being given." ~ Thomas Moore, 'Care of the Soul'.

Q. Is it really possible to heal NPD?

A. Anything is possible. You do not have to be a negative statistic on a probablity curve of people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Heal NPD :: Open Topic :: Devaluing a relationship
Who's Online | Stats | Memberlist | Chatroom | Search | Lost Password |


Shout Box

"


Welcome, Register :: Log In 
Friends of Narcissus active in this forum:
Friends of Narcissus active in this thread:

human beings online in the last 15 minutes - 0 Friend(s) of Narcissus, 0 covert NPDers and 0 Beloved and cherished GUEST(s) of Narcissus. (Most ever was 72 at 03:16:23 Wed Dec 4 2013)

Pages: [ 1 ]

[ < ] [ > ]

WHatever
Offline
43 posts


Mood Now: Hardcore_Headbanging
Post Mood: Hardcore_Headbanging

Reply
Devaluing a relationship ( 00:39:49 MonApr 25 2005 )

Can someone help me understand what is meant by devaluing a relationship? I saw this referenced in a recent thread but it was no expanded on in much detail. I can guess the general idea that was being talked about but I'd like to hear more of if this is something common or restricted to NPDers. Just curious.

  
Mood:Mood Now: Hardcore_Headbanging ( Hardcore_Headbanging ) Post Mood: Hardcore_Headbanging ( Hardcore_Headbanging )
TcBrown
Offline
2954 posts



Cyber Healing PhD
Eat your heart out
Pacific Western



Mood Now: Bruised
Post Mood: Chatty

Reply
Re: Devaluing a relationship ( 16:33:16 MonApr 25 2005 )

This is something talked about extensively in the victims boards. I believe it to be little more than a label given to the painful feelings a person experiences when a relationship is based on conditional rather than unconditional love. Personally I've found it be most commonly used to cast blame and guilt and to suggest one person is totally responsible for the relationship not meeting the needs of another. In reality the person who is accused of devaluing a relationship is in pain as well because their expectations or needs have likewise not beenfullfilled. The pain experienced here is important, the title of devaluing is worthless. Some common examples I've heard of the alleged devaluation process are affairs, silent treatment, not keeping promises, not being emotionally present, etc. Again all of these are important in and of themselves but they are all symptoms of illusions of love, or conditional love, rather than a specific "devaluation."






---
Instead of quoting the Budda, be the Budda, be "the awakened one," which is what the word budda means.

Eckhart Tolle, "The Power of Now"

 
 
Mood:Mood Now: Bruised ( Bruised ) Post Mood: Chatty ( Chatty )

Pages: [ 1 ]

[ < ] [ > ]

 
  • Can't start a new thread. (Host Only)
  • Can't start a new poll. (Host Only)
  • Can't add a reply. (Host Only)
  • Can't edit your posts.(Everyone Registered)Total Friends of Narcissus: 4110

  • Can't start a new thread. (Host Only)
  • Can't start a new poll. (Host Only)
  • Can't add a reply. (Host Only)
  • Can't edit your posts.(Everyone Registered)
  • Register :: Log In :: Steering Committee

    The time is now 12:25:53 Sat Oct 21 2017

    Powered By BbBoard V1.4.2
    © 2001-2007 BbBoy.net

    Community created
    3.10.2003


    The Healing Narcissism And Disorders of the Self Community is not affiliated in any way with any mental health professional or agency. The advice given is from personal experience and should never be used as a replacement for therapy from a qualified licensed professional. If you are having a real life emergency and live in the United States please call your doctor or 9-1-1.